Put the 'Pro' In Speaking Professionally

or 'How not to sound stupid at work when you're trying to sound smart'

As you navigate the new landscape of the technology industry as an early-career designer, you may find yourself wondering about the little things that can make a big difference in how your colleagues and clients perceive you.

One of those things is how you refer to yourself and your team in conversation and writing.

A common mistake I see people make when trying to sound professional is using "myself" instead of "I."

For example, instead of saying, "My team and I will be working on this project," they might say, "My team and myself will be working on this project." But this is actually incorrect grammar. It sounds like you're trying to be professional - but getting it wrong.

So, what's the difference between "me," "myself," and "I?" 

The difference between "me" and "myself" is that "me" is an object pronoun, while "myself" is a reflexive pronoun. We use object pronouns when the pronoun is the object of a verb or preposition, but we use reflexive pronouns when the subject and object of a sentence are the same.

For example, "My boss asked me to complete the project" is correct because "me" is the object of the verb "asked." However, "I gave myself a pat on the back" is correct because "myself" is the object of the verb "gave," and it is also the subject of the sentence.

It's important to use "me" and "my team" instead of "myself and my team," because "myself" is not the object of the verb. If you want to use "myself" in a sentence, it should be used alone, like "I did it myself."

Here’s the main takeaway: when referring to yourself, use "I" as the subject of the sentence and "me" as the object. Use "myself" only when the subject and object of the sentence are the same. And remember, when referring to yourself and your team, use "me and my team" instead of "myself and my team." You can also use “my team and I” and be grammatically correct.

By understanding the difference between "I," "me," and "myself," you can communicate more effectively and professionally. 

It can be easy to get caught up in trying to sound professional, but remember these little grammar rules and you’ll never have to worry if you sound professional - you will.

If you're ever unsure how to use a word correctly, don't be afraid to ask a coworker or look at a grammar book. The one recommended by my former managing editor is Dreyer’s English: An Utterly Correct Guide to Clarity and Style.

Note: This is not a suggestion to change your entire manner of speaking. Just a small tip, a tweak, to be professionally and grammatically correct. If you’re into that sort of thing.